I was in the staff lounge copying a book (which takes a good while to spit out so I spent the waiting time walking around the table that hosted the snacks, namely the glazed donut holes) when a fellow co-worker walks in and excitely says did you feel it? I did not. It seems we had an after shock that registered 4.5. I must have been chewing those 10, 15 donut holes with my own rumbling fever.
Okay so yesterday we had an earthquake drill. The entire school should know exactly how to react when the earth rumbles-so you'd think. Instead of finding humans of all sizes huddling under there desks...everyone sat exactly as they were, doing exactly what they were; which was MAP testing.
I find that doubly humorous...what good is learning the earthquake technique if when you feel the earth shake you do nothing? Is the procedure for aftershock different from the technique for the original shock?
You know what I say one does when they aren't sure...they sing! An appropriate song.
Friday, April 18, 2008
4.5, The After Shock
5.2
Call it what you may...peculiar, uncanny, erie but, we had a earthquake drill at work yesterday.
This morning at 430am King Ralph and I awoke to our bed rumbling--as if we had one of those sleazy hotel beds with a twenty-five cent vibrating machine. The windows were shaking, maybe a wind storm. Then King Ralph said it out loud; "I think we are having an earthquake". He was right. It took me staring at the TV for 30 minutes before the "breaking news" flashed across the screen reporting it was an earthquake--registered a 5.2.
Still I say erie that we had an earthquake drill the day before.
This morning at 430am King Ralph and I awoke to our bed rumbling--as if we had one of those sleazy hotel beds with a twenty-five cent vibrating machine. The windows were shaking, maybe a wind storm. Then King Ralph said it out loud; "I think we are having an earthquake". He was right. It took me staring at the TV for 30 minutes before the "breaking news" flashed across the screen reporting it was an earthquake--registered a 5.2.
Still I say erie that we had an earthquake drill the day before.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Remembering
I am remembering today what it was like to be home.
While my patient sleeps (with the use of a controlled substance); I am going to do a load of laundry, scrub the toilet, sweep the floors and empty the dishwasher. Maybe watch a talk show.
Aaaaahhhh, the days.
While my patient sleeps (with the use of a controlled substance); I am going to do a load of laundry, scrub the toilet, sweep the floors and empty the dishwasher. Maybe watch a talk show.
Aaaaahhhh, the days.
Monday, April 14, 2008
Gift of Mercy
It was around this time last year when M was confirmed... it was also at a time in her life when she questioned, "why me". The girl who had to have a third eye surgery, the girl who had to wear a back brace, the girl with this problem and that problem. As the confirmation service was coming to a close our minister anointed each one with a special gift that characterized who they each are as a child of God-- M was the given the Gift of Mercy.
Today she questions again "why me"? I remind her of her gift-- the Gift of Mercy. Although today I am the one who is trying like hell to translate that compassion into cheerfully done deeds that reflect Christ's love and alleviate the suffering.
When I went into her bedroom at 6am to see how she was feeling-- if school was a possibility-- I found her flat on her back, no covers, and tears silently rolling down her cheeks. My baby, my love child had not slept all night, lying there in pain from head to toe, never called out to me because; a pediatrician's (not our regular) prescription was to "suck it up". Every mom knows even if you can't heal your child or ease there pain with medications you can at least stake a vigil at the bedside. If nothing else I could have rubbed the 50% of her body not afflicted with the shingles. Sometimes just knowing mom is near helps. I at least believe this. Maybe cause it makes me feel better as a mom. Probably more so because the horrible blistering rash continues to over take half her torso. To which I say stop spreading. Stop. Stop. Stop.
As soon as the clock struck 8am I went in Five-Star General mode. I demanded prescription pain medication. By 330pm another parent, a medical professional, convinced me that M was receiving inadequate care telling me exactly the drug she should be administered. The doctor's office probably has me red flagged as a wench but, I got what I needed, what I wanted. Amen!
M will be taking another day of rest tomorrow, even though she is freaked about missing Algebra and French (which if you ask me that coo-coo French teacher is partly the cause of the shingles, the woman gives me shingles just thinking about her). Sometimes you just need to let the body shut down so it can begin to heal itself.
King Ralph thinks all medications begin healing when served with a favorite food so the menu reads: two Tylenol with Codeine every four hours, Acyclvoir 4x's a day with a side of Spaghetti-o's with meatballs, mac-n-cheese, orange sherbert, Skittles and a Snickers bar...with a side of WWE Monday Night Raw (which I still don't get or understand the love and passion for and probably never will).
Excuse while I leave you... M has, well, expelled some of her favorites-- needs to test my hidden janitorial skills. Poor, poor baby.
Enough I say. Enough!
Today she questions again "why me"? I remind her of her gift-- the Gift of Mercy. Although today I am the one who is trying like hell to translate that compassion into cheerfully done deeds that reflect Christ's love and alleviate the suffering.
When I went into her bedroom at 6am to see how she was feeling-- if school was a possibility-- I found her flat on her back, no covers, and tears silently rolling down her cheeks. My baby, my love child had not slept all night, lying there in pain from head to toe, never called out to me because; a pediatrician's (not our regular) prescription was to "suck it up". Every mom knows even if you can't heal your child or ease there pain with medications you can at least stake a vigil at the bedside. If nothing else I could have rubbed the 50% of her body not afflicted with the shingles. Sometimes just knowing mom is near helps. I at least believe this. Maybe cause it makes me feel better as a mom. Probably more so because the horrible blistering rash continues to over take half her torso. To which I say stop spreading. Stop. Stop. Stop.
As soon as the clock struck 8am I went in Five-Star General mode. I demanded prescription pain medication. By 330pm another parent, a medical professional, convinced me that M was receiving inadequate care telling me exactly the drug she should be administered. The doctor's office probably has me red flagged as a wench but, I got what I needed, what I wanted. Amen!
M will be taking another day of rest tomorrow, even though she is freaked about missing Algebra and French (which if you ask me that coo-coo French teacher is partly the cause of the shingles, the woman gives me shingles just thinking about her). Sometimes you just need to let the body shut down so it can begin to heal itself.
King Ralph thinks all medications begin healing when served with a favorite food so the menu reads: two Tylenol with Codeine every four hours, Acyclvoir 4x's a day with a side of Spaghetti-o's with meatballs, mac-n-cheese, orange sherbert, Skittles and a Snickers bar...with a side of WWE Monday Night Raw (which I still don't get or understand the love and passion for and probably never will).
Excuse while I leave you... M has, well, expelled some of her favorites-- needs to test my hidden janitorial skills. Poor, poor baby.
Enough I say. Enough!
Sunday, April 13, 2008
not the kind you use for roofing
We all went to church this morning as a family, a rare thing with King Ralph's weekend work requirements. We were excited to be there together since Princess A was playing her flute-- she was accompanying two music pieces,one with the piano and one with the bell choir.
Our excitement faded quickly as the quarter size rash M had on her belly on Friday over took her torso...she complained it hurt to the touch and she had a shooting pain that came and went up one of her arms. I looked at King Ralph and said you don't think...he was like I think. So then we debated using the doctor's Sunday hours. So we broke down and used the Sunday hours.
Our family of five in a church pew turned to three.
Guess what? Our think was right on...my girly has the shingles.
There is something not quite right about being fifteen and having shingles. We are told the cause is a combo of her Florida sunburn and stress.
There is one thing I am pretty good at and that is being Florence Nightingale--so I will nurse her but, not touch...cause touching hurts.
I frown for her.
However, M has found one silver lining in this freak illness...she was told to refrain from wearing her back brace. I think I just might see her doing a few cartwheels over that prescription.
Our excitement faded quickly as the quarter size rash M had on her belly on Friday over took her torso...she complained it hurt to the touch and she had a shooting pain that came and went up one of her arms. I looked at King Ralph and said you don't think...he was like I think. So then we debated using the doctor's Sunday hours. So we broke down and used the Sunday hours.
Our family of five in a church pew turned to three.
Guess what? Our think was right on...my girly has the shingles.
There is something not quite right about being fifteen and having shingles. We are told the cause is a combo of her Florida sunburn and stress.
There is one thing I am pretty good at and that is being Florence Nightingale--so I will nurse her but, not touch...cause touching hurts.
I frown for her.
However, M has found one silver lining in this freak illness...she was told to refrain from wearing her back brace. I think I just might see her doing a few cartwheels over that prescription.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Sometimes You Just Have to...Brag
Today D and three of her friends performed a quartet at Solo/Ensemble Festival. They sang Shenandoah arranged by Jay Althouse. So if you don't mind I am going to brag--because that's what moms do [best].
First the girls took there appearance very seriously as last Friday I spent the evening at the mall while we purchased color coordinated dresses--of black, white with a splash of pink. There must have been something to looking good since it transcended into the beautiful harmonic tone that sprung from the vocal cords. They were absolute song birds. The tones just flowed effortlessly together, as if they were born to sing the song.
After we all left the performance room the judge approached there music teacher and asked her if the girls were eighth graders. They are all seventh graders. She told the music teacher she hasn't heard a group of girls who sounded so mature in tone at that age as they did. When the score sheet was posted (this festival was judicated) the girls received straight ones. Actually the judge wrote a one at the top of the sheet and then drug her pen down the sheet indicating one all the way down the score sheet. The music teacher said she has never seen that before. The judge even commented on there appearance.
So there you have it, my brag and I think I have every right since my baby and her buds were so awesome.
You kow what? The song is contagious. I can't stop singing--Oh Shenaddoah I long to hear you___Away_________you rolling river..........
First the girls took there appearance very seriously as last Friday I spent the evening at the mall while we purchased color coordinated dresses--of black, white with a splash of pink. There must have been something to looking good since it transcended into the beautiful harmonic tone that sprung from the vocal cords. They were absolute song birds. The tones just flowed effortlessly together, as if they were born to sing the song.
After we all left the performance room the judge approached there music teacher and asked her if the girls were eighth graders. They are all seventh graders. She told the music teacher she hasn't heard a group of girls who sounded so mature in tone at that age as they did. When the score sheet was posted (this festival was judicated) the girls received straight ones. Actually the judge wrote a one at the top of the sheet and then drug her pen down the sheet indicating one all the way down the score sheet. The music teacher said she has never seen that before. The judge even commented on there appearance.
So there you have it, my brag and I think I have every right since my baby and her buds were so awesome.
You kow what? The song is contagious. I can't stop singing--Oh Shenaddoah I long to hear you___Away_________you rolling river..........
Tuesday, April 08, 2008
TWI
TTWI-- Typing While Intoxicated
I just attended the victory party for the Crestwood mayor. It was a tough race--being he was unopposed.
Any who, how, I had two glasses of wine and for some reason (despite the fact I had food in my stomach) I am bit...well three, no two, sheets to the wind. Three cheers for the mayor and another three years.
Considering the high level of stress that fills the school (my employer) this month with MAP testing I think two glasses of wine was just what I didn't even know I needed-- but did.
I have to part ways here, the Cards are winning, WON, and I need to get back to my priority. Baseball.
I just attended the victory party for the Crestwood mayor. It was a tough race--being he was unopposed.
Any who, how, I had two glasses of wine and for some reason (despite the fact I had food in my stomach) I am bit...well three, no two, sheets to the wind. Three cheers for the mayor and another three years.
Considering the high level of stress that fills the school (my employer) this month with MAP testing I think two glasses of wine was just what I didn't even know I needed-- but did.
I have to part ways here, the Cards are winning, WON, and I need to get back to my priority. Baseball.
Monday, April 07, 2008
Manic Monday Recipe
Manic Monday Recipe
1 Saturday night that rolls into Sunday morning
1 Sunday night of fun that ends waaaaayyyyy past bed time (for everyone).
1 middle school-er who misses the bus (again).
1 quick check of the weeks calendar which shows--oh crap mini band camp this week
1 king having an MRI
1 keeper who has to be at work early
Mix it all together. Simmer on low till...this house is so out of sorts this Monday morning I think I will go to work to wrangle 850 elementary school kids to find a small measure of tranquility.
It is such a manic Monday at our house I can't even bring myself to sing a Bangles' song. But, but, but I can scream a bit--aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!
Oh, much better now.
1 Saturday night that rolls into Sunday morning
1 Sunday night of fun that ends waaaaayyyyy past bed time (for everyone).
1 middle school-er who misses the bus (again).
1 quick check of the weeks calendar which shows--oh crap mini band camp this week
1 king having an MRI
1 keeper who has to be at work early
Mix it all together. Simmer on low till...this house is so out of sorts this Monday morning I think I will go to work to wrangle 850 elementary school kids to find a small measure of tranquility.
It is such a manic Monday at our house I can't even bring myself to sing a Bangles' song. But, but, but I can scream a bit--aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!
Oh, much better now.
Saturday, April 05, 2008
Promenade 2008
Prom comes from the word promenade, and you sure can't promenade alone. Those are the words of Josie Geller.
If you are Princess A you think otherwise. Princess A wanted to attend her senior prom dateless she, didn't want to "have to babysit anyone". She wants to flutter about The Fabulous Fox Theater; home to the Junior/Senior Prom and schmooze with all her friends.
Every girl needs an up-do. Princess A's hair dresser felt compelled to divulge she didn't attend her senior prom because she was eight months pregnant. Princess A said "mom how was I to respond to that". I said well I guess say that's a bummer, what do you say?
She decided to practice dancing in her dress.
Is she not a Cinderella this evening?
She just might lose one of her rhinestone ornamented heels--before we know it Prince Charming could be knocking at our door.
Of course there is always some girl some group that has to expose her breasts...that girl is in there group. I wonder what that girl's mom thought? Did she say daughter your boobies are exposed? Will never know cause in four years of high school I have never seen this mom surface at any photo op. Aside from boob girl the girls all looked fabulously beautiful.
Just so all don't think the girls were all dateless...and I didn't take a guy's picture like I did the girls--I'll add a picture with a few of the boys.
This has me feeling all nostalgic. I am going to the basement to unearth, from its plastic preserver, my totally 80's sea foam blue-green metallic mermaid prom dress and clean the family room rec area.
If you are Princess A you think otherwise. Princess A wanted to attend her senior prom dateless she, didn't want to "have to babysit anyone". She wants to flutter about The Fabulous Fox Theater; home to the Junior/Senior Prom and schmooze with all her friends.
Every girl needs an up-do. Princess A's hair dresser felt compelled to divulge she didn't attend her senior prom because she was eight months pregnant. Princess A said "mom how was I to respond to that". I said well I guess say that's a bummer, what do you say?
She decided to practice dancing in her dress.
Is she not a Cinderella this evening?
She just might lose one of her rhinestone ornamented heels--before we know it Prince Charming could be knocking at our door.
Of course there is always some girl some group that has to expose her breasts...that girl is in there group. I wonder what that girl's mom thought? Did she say daughter your boobies are exposed? Will never know cause in four years of high school I have never seen this mom surface at any photo op. Aside from boob girl the girls all looked fabulously beautiful.
Just so all don't think the girls were all dateless...and I didn't take a guy's picture like I did the girls--I'll add a picture with a few of the boys.
This has me feeling all nostalgic. I am going to the basement to unearth, from its plastic preserver, my totally 80's sea foam blue-green metallic mermaid prom dress and clean the family room rec area.
Friday, April 04, 2008
Panties you say...what the fun?
The final duty of my workday is parent pick-up in the cafeteria. Imagine my dismay when I walked into the cafeteria to find the fifth graders had set up there Saturday garage sale...and when I say set up I mean SET UP.
Flash back...several years ago King Ralph drug me around, house after house, through our neighborhood garage sale. It was then that I came to the conclusion that the selling of half used toiletries was disturbing.
So imagine how freaked I was walking into a cafeteria where I was to match children to parent in a sea of, hoards of crap--I'm sorry, one man's junk is another man's treasure--while these parents wanted to pre-shop. I felt like I had been dropped into Pandora's Box. But, the thing that caught my eye was the intimate apparel section on the cafeteria table. (This is giving new definition to Wednesday's lunch menu choice of tuna casserole.) Okay let me just say half used toiletries in some strange man's garage is one thing but, used Victoria panties and bras in a school cafeteria is--wrong on so many levels I can't even go there. The college male who works the latch key program snickered when I pointed out the fabulous shopping option, he responds, "do they come with stains". Oh brother. Then I pointed out the freaky selection zone on the table to the principal, saying I found it quite curious that the intimate apparel section was placed next to the feather boa section. She giggled at me and told me I was silly. Me silly? The teacher, parent, whoever it was that thought selling used I-touched-another's-cooter-panties at a school garage sale is the one that should be called silly...or maybe crazy. Not me. I'm sane enough to know that is just plain nasty!
Suggestions for panties you no longer want to wear...how 'bout making them a dust rag. Maybe wax the car with them. You could soak them in gasoline, use as a fire starter for a bonfire. If I sit here long enough (which I'm not) I could think of a million things better to do with used panties than to sell them in a school garage sale while displaying them on the cafeteria table!
Flash back...several years ago King Ralph drug me around, house after house, through our neighborhood garage sale. It was then that I came to the conclusion that the selling of half used toiletries was disturbing.
So imagine how freaked I was walking into a cafeteria where I was to match children to parent in a sea of, hoards of crap--I'm sorry, one man's junk is another man's treasure--while these parents wanted to pre-shop. I felt like I had been dropped into Pandora's Box. But, the thing that caught my eye was the intimate apparel section on the cafeteria table. (This is giving new definition to Wednesday's lunch menu choice of tuna casserole.) Okay let me just say half used toiletries in some strange man's garage is one thing but, used Victoria panties and bras in a school cafeteria is--wrong on so many levels I can't even go there. The college male who works the latch key program snickered when I pointed out the fabulous shopping option, he responds, "do they come with stains". Oh brother. Then I pointed out the freaky selection zone on the table to the principal, saying I found it quite curious that the intimate apparel section was placed next to the feather boa section. She giggled at me and told me I was silly. Me silly? The teacher, parent, whoever it was that thought selling used I-touched-another's-cooter-panties at a school garage sale is the one that should be called silly...or maybe crazy. Not me. I'm sane enough to know that is just plain nasty!
Suggestions for panties you no longer want to wear...how 'bout making them a dust rag. Maybe wax the car with them. You could soak them in gasoline, use as a fire starter for a bonfire. If I sit here long enough (which I'm not) I could think of a million things better to do with used panties than to sell them in a school garage sale while displaying them on the cafeteria table!
Thursday, April 03, 2008
know what
The best part about Thursday is that tomorrow is Friday.
...and that ER returned to my must see TV night.
...and that ER returned to my must see TV night.
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
What's for dinner Mom?
Hey family, we are having left over coke ham (since it was such a hit at Alee's birthday dinner last night) and I am throwing on the plate an ear of fresh corn and a spoon full of potato salad (that my grocery girl is picking up as I type). Don't complain just eat it!
I have 250 pencils left to sharpen for MAP testing...there is no time to cook. If I couldn't get the darn pencils sharpened in the office today, brought them home to sharpen, why would anyone think I have time to prefer a fresh meal? Not to mention it is the [second try] at the home opener for the Cardinals. Priorities family, priorities.
Plus, I'm tired.
Pencils, Red Birds and lack of sleep equals left over ham.
I have 250 pencils left to sharpen for MAP testing...there is no time to cook. If I couldn't get the darn pencils sharpened in the office today, brought them home to sharpen, why would anyone think I have time to prefer a fresh meal? Not to mention it is the [second try] at the home opener for the Cardinals. Priorities family, priorities.
Plus, I'm tired.
Pencils, Red Birds and lack of sleep equals left over ham.
Monday, March 31, 2008
How many in your party?
If someone was to ask that question today I would say three adults two children.
At 6:18am you came into this world, ever so tender, tiny and sweet; they placed you in my arms. A princess was born. I found a new kind of love. Your entrance into this world was the first and last time I saw your daddy cry. It was so long ago yet seems like yesterday.
Today you are an adult--eighteen years old.
Just a reminder of the list of privileges you named off last night:
1. can buy a lottery ticket (here's a dollar get a quick pick)
2. can buy rubber cement (your projects will hold together so much better)
3. can buy cigarettes (pick a pack up for your Funcle Dan this summer)
4. no question your crimes are punishable as an adult (so don't get in trouble)
5. can buy porn (so what's it gonna be Playboy or Playgirl)
6. You can vote (remember always, your vote matters, so cast it)
I am sure there are so many more privileges that come with being adult, we'll let you explore those on your own. Do always know, no matter how grown you are you will always be my baby girl. Love you!
Happy 18th Birthday Princess A!
At 6:18am you came into this world, ever so tender, tiny and sweet; they placed you in my arms. A princess was born. I found a new kind of love. Your entrance into this world was the first and last time I saw your daddy cry. It was so long ago yet seems like yesterday.
Today you are an adult--eighteen years old.
Just a reminder of the list of privileges you named off last night:
1. can buy a lottery ticket (here's a dollar get a quick pick)
2. can buy rubber cement (your projects will hold together so much better)
3. can buy cigarettes (pick a pack up for your Funcle Dan this summer)
4. no question your crimes are punishable as an adult (so don't get in trouble)
5. can buy porn (so what's it gonna be Playboy or Playgirl)
6. You can vote (remember always, your vote matters, so cast it)
I am sure there are so many more privileges that come with being adult, we'll let you explore those on your own. Do always know, no matter how grown you are you will always be my baby girl. Love you!
Happy 18th Birthday Princess A!
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Home
The best part of a long car ride is this:
...the girls laughing.
Another good part of the long car ride home was this:
...finding my Michigan planted sister and her family in Nashville.
Now we're home and the mess I left and the mess we drug in from the car is spreading like a cancer. Immediate treatment is the plan of action.
Friday, March 28, 2008
Sun & Sand
We are stretched out in a nice hotel room after a traffic jammed, slow moving day on the highway. The sun burns that color us all are easing--at least a bit.
We ended our day at the Islander with a sight rarely experienced...M, D and I shared an elevator a hotel guest like none other--Hank. Hank is a pig. Yes, I said a p-i-g, PIG. Hank is afraid of elevators so he squealed like...well, like a scared pig. He got off on the lobby floor (squealing) to go out and relieve himself. It wasn't long before the hotel security staff and the manager decided a squealing, elevator fearful pig was not a welcome guest. The kids said a Latino woman got off the elevator and whispered under her breath, "Jesus Christ". It was a moment I wish I had had my camera handy--I didn't; sharing an elevator with a pig.
So now enjoy a few favorite snap shots.
A day on the beach with my girls--a good day.
Father & Daughters
Mother & Daughters
The King and his queen
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Tropical Thursday, Girls Gone Wild
It is most certainly a beautiful beach weather day-- sun is shining, the sky is blue for miles, the waves in the ocean move forward with just the right amount of white cap …why shouldn’t it be; here at The Islander it is “Tropical Thursday”. Three dollar mai tais for all with cash. (Fear not I have a bottle of Smirnoff Vodka and a jug of Crystal Light for a mixer.)
Yesterday’s Wild Wednesday with its $5 strawberry daiquiris—well I needed to be in a total state of Amy Winehouse in order to accept King Ralph’s mistake of booking a prepaid room in DAYTONA Beach Shores instead of his intended booking at The Islander in New Smyrna Beach. Simple oversight, right? Maybe not...as far as we girls are concerned. Oh God be with me while we vacation here, thankfully only for two days, in this nasty-of-nastiest beach front hotel on earth. To relieve my fear of virus I brought in the can of Lysol from the car and sprayed the beds before slumbering (you can sense the beds have a few hard ridden miles on them). College kids dig this place for some reason—maybe it is the themed days at the pool side Tiki Bar. Bonus—I must be a Stifler's mom because last I got invited, along with Princess A, to a room party. Whoaaa-hooo, I must still possess the presence of hot- fun- girl…and, although a few of these kids would benefit from a good reading from the Bible I keep in car—I suggested to one young lad if he remained intoxicated his entire trip he would begin to think he was actually staying in a nice hotel. So Princess A made this for me in the sand….
Really in the end what matters most is that (I stay out of the room and on the beach) we are laughing, singing our favorite greatest hits and turning our albacore tuna colored skin to a nice Native American tone.
…and so I say life in Daytona is good. Girls Gone Wild here we come. Now wouldn’t this make Grandma’s day? I bet it would! Three cheers to Spring Break 2008.
Yesterday’s Wild Wednesday with its $5 strawberry daiquiris—well I needed to be in a total state of Amy Winehouse in order to accept King Ralph’s mistake of booking a prepaid room in DAYTONA Beach Shores instead of his intended booking at The Islander in New Smyrna Beach. Simple oversight, right? Maybe not...as far as we girls are concerned. Oh God be with me while we vacation here, thankfully only for two days, in this nasty-of-nastiest beach front hotel on earth. To relieve my fear of virus I brought in the can of Lysol from the car and sprayed the beds before slumbering (you can sense the beds have a few hard ridden miles on them). College kids dig this place for some reason—maybe it is the themed days at the pool side Tiki Bar. Bonus—I must be a Stifler's mom because last I got invited, along with Princess A, to a room party. Whoaaa-hooo, I must still possess the presence of hot- fun- girl…and, although a few of these kids would benefit from a good reading from the Bible I keep in car—I suggested to one young lad if he remained intoxicated his entire trip he would begin to think he was actually staying in a nice hotel. So Princess A made this for me in the sand….
Really in the end what matters most is that (I stay out of the room and on the beach) we are laughing, singing our favorite greatest hits and turning our albacore tuna colored skin to a nice Native American tone.
…and so I say life in Daytona is good. Girls Gone Wild here we come. Now wouldn’t this make Grandma’s day? I bet it would! Three cheers to Spring Break 2008.
* tomorrow I will post some beach beauty pics for your enjoyment
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
A Few Snapshots
Just a few typical,cheesy, got-to-take Orlando tourist snapshots...cause it wouldn't be a trip without them. Since these days cheesy is refreshing....
...we made them pose with Jaws.
The next day the girls insisted the parents get cheesy too. Oooooo Jaws attack, scary.
What's a theme park without a character pic... besides, everyone loves Curious George.
Calling you "King Ralph" is a joke and now that we can read your thoughts we girls now know your thinkng it.
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Jelly Beans & Church Crashing
Greeting and Happy Easter from our temporary home-- the sunshine state and the Holiday Inn Suites.
In my somewhat attempt to mimic my years past masquerade as the Easter Bunny--I tossed on the counter of the hotel room kitchenette bags of M&M's, Snicker Eggs, Peeps (because what is Easter without a peep) and Jelly Beans. Not a single thing arranged beautifully in pastel colored baskets with bows, just hole bags of goodness. Thank God the girls are all teens and it didn't matter to them that there weren't dyed eggs and basket hide and seek--what mattered is that we aren't in Saint Louis where the weather is in the thirties with snow flurries and flooded rivers surround.
To keep in good with tradition King Ralph convinced us all that we needed to find a church and worship on the holiest holy of Christian holidays. We did just that. It was most adorable church-- quaint and small-- with Easter egg colored stain glass windows; but filled with church crashers galore. We were asked to sport name tags that not only announced our name but where we originate from. We shared pew with folk from Ohio, California, Minneapolis, etc. It was a fulfilling experience in a house of worship ever so welcoming.
Then we came back to our hotel changed from our spring dresses and headed to Universal Studios. Nothing is better than gnawing on jelly beans while waiting in line to ride "Jaws".
Which brings me to this....
Dear Man in Front Of Us in Line-
You must have turned your Easter eggs into egg salad before you entered the park. You know what makes me think this? Well the fact that you had to blow your intestines clean while in line may have been an indicator. You think you are a ventriloquist farter but you aren't; we sniffed you out. You not only gassed us out once but twice.UNACCEPTABLE! The poor lads in front of you had to take there T-shirts to cover there noses in an effort to preserve what little bit of clean air you left for your fellow mans to breath. I think King Ralph's advice to you was perfect--get yourself to a bathroom. I certainly hope you were able to read his mind and took the King's advice.
When we left the park we headed out for a steak dinner.
Then we called my mother-in-law who inquired to Princess A if she would be able to get on TV for a debut on Girls Gone Wild. She did say to her "maybe that isn't a good idea with your parents along". Oh brother, my mother-in-law gets funnier and funnier with age. A little FYI Grandma-- Girls Gone Wild doesn't film in Orlando. Not to mention, silly Grandma, Girls Gone Wild isn't for Princess!
Once again, Happy Easter!
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Totally Freaking Stressed!
I am stressed beyond words. I sit here in my robe with wet hair...I leave for work in 40 minutes, aaaaaaahhhhhhh! I have the car almost packed and what I forget, well, I will forget and have to learn to live with it. My house is being left a mess. Who cares I say to myself the mess will still be here when I return. I will apologize to the dog sitter for its appearance when I return.
The bright spot in my day is that I won the "It's My Day" contest over at Manic Mom's blog. My prize is a fabulous and fun T-shirt. I will tell all about it when I model the T-shirt, here, and soon (I hope).
The bright spot in my day is that I won the "It's My Day" contest over at Manic Mom's blog. My prize is a fabulous and fun T-shirt. I will tell all about it when I model the T-shirt, here, and soon (I hope).
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
It's Official
I AM OFFICIALLY STRESSED.
I think at this point I would be better to take the family on a vacation to a nudist resort--as I have not packed a stitch of clothes for a trip we leave on tomorrow.
I think at this point I would be better to take the family on a vacation to a nudist resort--as I have not packed a stitch of clothes for a trip we leave on tomorrow.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
My Name is Jodi and I am a Laundryaholic
I think of myself more as a binge laundress. I don't launder often but when I do I really go at it.
If I don't come out from the laundry by Thursday (with packed suitcases) send someone in to get me, throw my *&# in the car and send it to Florida.
If I don't come out from the laundry by Thursday (with packed suitcases) send someone in to get me, throw my *&# in the car and send it to Florida.
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Pictures of the Week
"Puppy Love" by Princess A
"There is Always Light at the End of Every Tunnel" by Princess A
"There is Always Light at the End of Every Tunnel" by Princess A
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Vitaman B
I was desperately in need of a dose of vitamin B. Thank God that the sun shone so yesterday infusing my body--making it a most magnificent day.
Although today won't be quite as glorious--my eight hours of sleep and the impending 60* has me feeling so good I don't believe I will be looking at the calender counting the days till I reach the Florida sun.
Although today won't be quite as glorious--my eight hours of sleep and the impending 60* has me feeling so good I don't believe I will be looking at the calender counting the days till I reach the Florida sun.
Friday, March 07, 2008
Those With Low Self-Esteem Need Not Apply For Job
Someone with low self esteem may not survive working in an elementary school...good thing my self esteem is in check.
Today a little fellow said to me, "Mrs. Avery you haven't told us everything about you." I replied, "like what?" He said "like that you smoke", "I don't smoke" I said. To which he replied "then why do you have wrinkles around your eyes". I smiled at him and chuckled and said "because I am old."
When I got back into in the office and told my co-workers what the little fellow said to me--one of the girls said "well then don't let him see me!"
I still sit here chuckling to myself at how honest--no holding back, little kids are. Now I am debating between a new face cream or testing out reserve osmosis by starting to smoke. Who knows maybe it would firm up my wrinkles. Which, by the way, I refer to as character lines.
Kids, you gotta love'm!
Today a little fellow said to me, "Mrs. Avery you haven't told us everything about you." I replied, "like what?" He said "like that you smoke", "I don't smoke" I said. To which he replied "then why do you have wrinkles around your eyes". I smiled at him and chuckled and said "because I am old."
When I got back into in the office and told my co-workers what the little fellow said to me--one of the girls said "well then don't let him see me!"
I still sit here chuckling to myself at how honest--no holding back, little kids are. Now I am debating between a new face cream or testing out reserve osmosis by starting to smoke. Who knows maybe it would firm up my wrinkles. Which, by the way, I refer to as character lines.
Kids, you gotta love'm!
Thursday, March 06, 2008
Recovery
The day after--sometimes makes up for that day before. Morning peace was restored. Not to say some hidden resentment doesn't still linger. Because it does. However I love when I am the mom who cannot be weakened from the punishment I dished out in the heated moment. I love when the girls know--this gal means business.
Yesterday in my need to regroup I found those diamond earrings I wanted to return starring me in the face, just screaming out, we can cheer you up. So, I, suppose I am keeping them. (the snob in me really wanted to return them because they aren't as big as the one I lost...how can I complain they are diamonds regardless.) Then I bought myself a Vera Wang tuxedo style shirt which is delicious. I am wearing it today with a pair of semi-sensible shoes.
I think on the way to work I will review our spring break road trip best of music selection--AC/DC. Nothing like a chorus of Big Balls to start of a Thursday morning.
Yesterday in my need to regroup I found those diamond earrings I wanted to return starring me in the face, just screaming out, we can cheer you up. So, I, suppose I am keeping them. (the snob in me really wanted to return them because they aren't as big as the one I lost...how can I complain they are diamonds regardless.) Then I bought myself a Vera Wang tuxedo style shirt which is delicious. I am wearing it today with a pair of semi-sensible shoes.
I think on the way to work I will review our spring break road trip best of music selection--AC/DC. Nothing like a chorus of Big Balls to start of a Thursday morning.
Wednesday, March 05, 2008
Topsy Turvy
I prefer my mornings to be calm, with realtive peacefulness. This morning-- total opposite!
So I will take a moment to meditate, pray, and calm the soul. Then tell myself its a phase, this too shall pass.
Its moments like this morning that I have to thank God I love my kid because there are moments when I just can't like her.
Parenting. The hardest job ever!
So I will take a moment to meditate, pray, and calm the soul. Then tell myself its a phase, this too shall pass.
Its moments like this morning that I have to thank God I love my kid because there are moments when I just can't like her.
Parenting. The hardest job ever!
Monday, March 03, 2008
Reminder
I need a ribbon tied on my finger with a note...you know the universal symbol for "reminder".
What I need to remind myself that I need an ice scraper in my car. I know just because I stayed home raising my daughters for seventeen years is not a viable excuse for being ill prepared with the proper tools when inclement weather hits. Truth is when I stayed home, I did just that, stayed home. So there was no need for an ice scraper.
Today when I left work little mini van was blanketed in ice. Thank God for Jimmy Buffet--he saved the day. Although he must have been a little bit in Margaritaville since the CD case could not tackle the ice on the passenger side of the front wind shield. In this case I just hopped back in the car, cranked up the defrost and sang "cheeseburger in paradise, I like mine with lettuce and tomato, Heinz 57 and french fried potatoes...." Until the ice began to melt away.
Now...I have homework and, a lemon drop martini to drink. It came with my homework packet. I swear. You wonder why I love my job?
What I need to remind myself that I need an ice scraper in my car. I know just because I stayed home raising my daughters for seventeen years is not a viable excuse for being ill prepared with the proper tools when inclement weather hits. Truth is when I stayed home, I did just that, stayed home. So there was no need for an ice scraper.
Today when I left work little mini van was blanketed in ice. Thank God for Jimmy Buffet--he saved the day. Although he must have been a little bit in Margaritaville since the CD case could not tackle the ice on the passenger side of the front wind shield. In this case I just hopped back in the car, cranked up the defrost and sang "cheeseburger in paradise, I like mine with lettuce and tomato, Heinz 57 and french fried potatoes...." Until the ice began to melt away.
Now...I have homework and, a lemon drop martini to drink. It came with my homework packet. I swear. You wonder why I love my job?
Friday, February 29, 2008
Amend
My hair.....
Okay so I have been having a bad hair week, not so much by the standards of others but to myself I am--having a bad hair week. So today I decided the heck with it, no it was more like the hell with it. I just washed, rubbed totally twisted curl scrunch gel in and out the door I went. It was what I referred to as my "rock star hair". What I loved most about this totally careless, non-coiffed hair style was the statements by the students and some of my fellow co-workers.
Here I go, listing my favorite comments.
Paula: "Wow your hair, that is what I call unplugged"
Sean: "your hair...did you wake up at 2am?"
Kat: "nooooo, I'm not liking it. It looks like you just got out of bed"
Jordyn: (while looking up at me strangely) "wacky hair"
3rd grade boy: "did you style your hair to look like Gene Simmons? Do you know who Gene Simmons is"
Me: "I know who Gene is I grew up listening to Kiss, I was actually going more for a Ted Nugent look"
I think in spite of all the comments my big, and little friends voiced I am going to wear my rock star hair on Monday too. Just to nerve them all.
With that said....rock on.
Okay so I have been having a bad hair week, not so much by the standards of others but to myself I am--having a bad hair week. So today I decided the heck with it, no it was more like the hell with it. I just washed, rubbed totally twisted curl scrunch gel in and out the door I went. It was what I referred to as my "rock star hair". What I loved most about this totally careless, non-coiffed hair style was the statements by the students and some of my fellow co-workers.
Here I go, listing my favorite comments.
Paula: "Wow your hair, that is what I call unplugged"
Sean: "your hair...did you wake up at 2am?"
Kat: "nooooo, I'm not liking it. It looks like you just got out of bed"
Jordyn: (while looking up at me strangely) "wacky hair"
3rd grade boy: "did you style your hair to look like Gene Simmons? Do you know who Gene Simmons is"
Me: "I know who Gene is I grew up listening to Kiss, I was actually going more for a Ted Nugent look"
I think in spite of all the comments my big, and little friends voiced I am going to wear my rock star hair on Monday too. Just to nerve them all.
With that said....rock on.
Simply, Thoughts
I need caffeine!
If I were to die today I would hope heaven would look like Nordstrom's shoe department.
This morning I expressed myself with such eloquence and honesty--I surely made my daughter proud. (It felt g-r-e-a-t to get that off my chest.)
My hair--I am having not a bad hair day but a bad hair week.
I want to lose the goose down coat at recess in exchange for a pair of walking shorts and flat sandals.
If I were to die today I would hope heaven would look like Nordstrom's shoe department.
This morning I expressed myself with such eloquence and honesty--I surely made my daughter proud. (It felt g-r-e-a-t to get that off my chest.)
My hair--I am having not a bad hair day but a bad hair week.
I want to lose the goose down coat at recess in exchange for a pair of walking shorts and flat sandals.
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Does Redneck Outweigh Romance?
I have just subjected myself to what has to be hands down the reason and cause for the writer's to have ended the strike--CMT's Big Redneck Wedding. Of course a show like that has a way of sucking you into its Saturday afternoon marathon run.
It wasn't until the second episode that I lost my slack-jawed awe and let myself roll in laughter. The green wedding dress accented by a camo veil was breath taking. I then began taking careful notes in the case my daughters bring home a redneck to marry. I will refute any suggestion of serving beans and corn bread at the reception, with a chance the groom may say, “the beans are starting to work on me.” With side dishes of pigs-in-a-blanket, pickled pig’s feet (still in the jars) and pork rines (by the bowls)--sides like these put tossed salad and green bean almandine to shame.
By the third episode of the marathon I was fully immersed. If you live within 100 miles of me you could probably hear the sound of my laughter at the redneck couple from Florida as they went gleefully--well not so much the bride because she lacked any, if not all ability to smile--to the pet and feed store to purchase the groom's wedding attire. Oh yes, and the grooms men’s fresh camo. The maid of honor, sister of the bride, was less than pleased at the bride’s maid's fashion of denim mini skirt and camo colored camisole (thank God one person in the episode had quality taste). The sister did not hide her sarcastic tone in the nail salon as her redneck sister proudly rambled about the beauty her wedding was to behold. Let me say there is nothing more moving then men making way to the alter by means of an ATV, followed by the bride on her horse. Which if I may add the dismount in the bridal gown was beautiful; I gave her a five out of ten. With the guest seated on there truck tailgates…you couldn’t have dreamed this picture if you tried. But what had me hooping a holler was the entertainment--mattress surfing and mud wrestling. Yes I said mattress surfing; a twin size mattress attached to the back of an ATV like a sled and being spun around in a grass field. You’re thinking, now why didn’t I think of that for my wedding reception? I tell you why you didn’t think of it because the frat boys already have… for rush week.
My favorite lines this couple allowed to be captured on film were:
Bride- "ya we met 6,7,8 years ago"
(King Ralph even laughed at the gal who couldn't, exactly, remember when she met her redneck prince.)
Groom- "honey let's go constipate this here marriage".
(I guess a night of mattress surfing and mud wrestling your mama in a blow up kiddie pool would constipate any groom, and bride.)
This friend is why the writers needed to end the strike. America could not, should not be allowed to subject themselves to a TV marathon event of --The Redneck Wedding.
To quell my wedding fears I just returned from seeing 27 Dresses. It restored the fact that I am, at heart, a terrible romantic.
It wasn't until the second episode that I lost my slack-jawed awe and let myself roll in laughter. The green wedding dress accented by a camo veil was breath taking. I then began taking careful notes in the case my daughters bring home a redneck to marry. I will refute any suggestion of serving beans and corn bread at the reception, with a chance the groom may say, “the beans are starting to work on me.” With side dishes of pigs-in-a-blanket, pickled pig’s feet (still in the jars) and pork rines (by the bowls)--sides like these put tossed salad and green bean almandine to shame.
By the third episode of the marathon I was fully immersed. If you live within 100 miles of me you could probably hear the sound of my laughter at the redneck couple from Florida as they went gleefully--well not so much the bride because she lacked any, if not all ability to smile--to the pet and feed store to purchase the groom's wedding attire. Oh yes, and the grooms men’s fresh camo. The maid of honor, sister of the bride, was less than pleased at the bride’s maid's fashion of denim mini skirt and camo colored camisole (thank God one person in the episode had quality taste). The sister did not hide her sarcastic tone in the nail salon as her redneck sister proudly rambled about the beauty her wedding was to behold. Let me say there is nothing more moving then men making way to the alter by means of an ATV, followed by the bride on her horse. Which if I may add the dismount in the bridal gown was beautiful; I gave her a five out of ten. With the guest seated on there truck tailgates…you couldn’t have dreamed this picture if you tried. But what had me hooping a holler was the entertainment--mattress surfing and mud wrestling. Yes I said mattress surfing; a twin size mattress attached to the back of an ATV like a sled and being spun around in a grass field. You’re thinking, now why didn’t I think of that for my wedding reception? I tell you why you didn’t think of it because the frat boys already have… for rush week.
My favorite lines this couple allowed to be captured on film were:
Bride- "ya we met 6,7,8 years ago"
(King Ralph even laughed at the gal who couldn't, exactly, remember when she met her redneck prince.)
Groom- "honey let's go constipate this here marriage".
(I guess a night of mattress surfing and mud wrestling your mama in a blow up kiddie pool would constipate any groom, and bride.)
This friend is why the writers needed to end the strike. America could not, should not be allowed to subject themselves to a TV marathon event of --The Redneck Wedding.
To quell my wedding fears I just returned from seeing 27 Dresses. It restored the fact that I am, at heart, a terrible romantic.
It's a Record
Not quite worthy of The Guinness Book of World Records but, defiantly a record for me.
I have managed to remain nearly firmly planted in my martini flannel PJ's since I put them on Wednesday night. I have peeled them from my skin only to color my hair, shower and change underwear.
I must say...that I am loving it! Even if you all think this makes me a lazy-useless-bum. I was merely paying homage to mother nature's blessing of double snow day.
I have managed to remain nearly firmly planted in my martini flannel PJ's since I put them on Wednesday night. I have peeled them from my skin only to color my hair, shower and change underwear.
I must say...that I am loving it! Even if you all think this makes me a lazy-useless-bum. I was merely paying homage to mother nature's blessing of double snow day.
Friday, February 22, 2008
Oh yes, another snow (ice) day!
We are definitely in the snow day hole now.
If I had to drive to pick up my pay check for the week I would spend it all in gas driving to pick it up. No school Monday. Half day Wednesday. Snow day Thursday and Friday. How do I tell King Ralph about the prom dress I bought Princess A on Wednesday night? I don't think I earned enough to justify the cost--to him. But the dress is magnificent! I will devise my plan while I continue my snow day retreat-- while wearing my PJ's.
By the way, the only requirement for a snow day retreat is to brush the teeth and change the underwear.
Happy Snow-Ice Day.
If I had to drive to pick up my pay check for the week I would spend it all in gas driving to pick it up. No school Monday. Half day Wednesday. Snow day Thursday and Friday. How do I tell King Ralph about the prom dress I bought Princess A on Wednesday night? I don't think I earned enough to justify the cost--to him. But the dress is magnificent! I will devise my plan while I continue my snow day retreat-- while wearing my PJ's.
By the way, the only requirement for a snow day retreat is to brush the teeth and change the underwear.
Happy Snow-Ice Day.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Jodi Jots
Since we are having a snow day, or an ice pellet day, I have plenty of time (between loads of laundry) to list some recent observations/thoughts. So here I go with another one of those who-really-gives-a-crap lists.
1. When I was a stay-at-home mom the heels of my feet where like sand paper from walking around barefoot. Now that I work and make use of all my cute unsensible shoes the balls of my feet feel like the padding on a dog's paw and my heels are soft.
2. My laundry room looks like a bomb went off in there. If you are the kind of person who fears death I couldn't let you step foot in.
3. The people in my house either think things put themselves away, I will pick up after them or they really just don't care about living amongst there clutter.
4. No one in my neighborhood is brave enough to tackle the ice pelleted streets...except King Ralph.
5. Why some teenagers think it a good use of cyber space to air there negative feelings on-line with the use of flowered words?
6. A day off without pay is a good day to rekindle a love for Heathcliff. I am going to watch Wuthering Heights between loads of laundry.
7. Why do I wash more clothes than 5 people can actually dirty in a seven day time span?
**breaking to heed to the buzz of the dryer**
8. When it comes to Project Runway's season finale-- patience is not my virtue. I love Rami!
9. I don't think I should keep King's Ralph gift of the replacement diamond earrings. (I love them, I just don't feel the spending of moneys for spoiled luxuries at this moment in life.)
10. I think my girls are gorgeous. Considering the amount of beauty sleep they are taking in on this snow day they will be, may even surpass, Vogue cover quality by the time they finally wake.
11. I am running out of liquid laundry soap so I may have to find a different chore to occupy me on this snow day.
12. My PJ's have now molded themselves to my body signaling the necessity to remain in them all day. That is good living!
1. When I was a stay-at-home mom the heels of my feet where like sand paper from walking around barefoot. Now that I work and make use of all my cute unsensible shoes the balls of my feet feel like the padding on a dog's paw and my heels are soft.
2. My laundry room looks like a bomb went off in there. If you are the kind of person who fears death I couldn't let you step foot in.
3. The people in my house either think things put themselves away, I will pick up after them or they really just don't care about living amongst there clutter.
4. No one in my neighborhood is brave enough to tackle the ice pelleted streets...except King Ralph.
5. Why some teenagers think it a good use of cyber space to air there negative feelings on-line with the use of flowered words?
6. A day off without pay is a good day to rekindle a love for Heathcliff. I am going to watch Wuthering Heights between loads of laundry.
7. Why do I wash more clothes than 5 people can actually dirty in a seven day time span?
**breaking to heed to the buzz of the dryer**
8. When it comes to Project Runway's season finale-- patience is not my virtue. I love Rami!
9. I don't think I should keep King's Ralph gift of the replacement diamond earrings. (I love them, I just don't feel the spending of moneys for spoiled luxuries at this moment in life.)
10. I think my girls are gorgeous. Considering the amount of beauty sleep they are taking in on this snow day they will be, may even surpass, Vogue cover quality by the time they finally wake.
11. I am running out of liquid laundry soap so I may have to find a different chore to occupy me on this snow day.
12. My PJ's have now molded themselves to my body signaling the necessity to remain in them all day. That is good living!
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
woMAN IN BLACK
I must have been channeling Johnny Cash, Man in Black, this morning when I got dressed. Black long sleeve t-shirt. Black trousers. Black socks. Black shoes--new, "sensible" shoes. The only thing not black was my pasty white skin screaming for a trip to the Florida sun. Soon. Very soon.
Monday, February 18, 2008
Hail to the Chiefs of Past
President's Day. A national holiday that I, today, came to appreciate more than ever before. A day off work. I needed this long weekend.
Saturday I spend the day sleeping. The whole day sleeping. While everyone I come in contact with seems to have some form of the flu which accompanies a fever...I have escaped the fever part but the head congestion and unexplainable fatigue did not pass me by. So, after my nearly 24-hour nap I feel like a peach again. My body just was screaming to shut down. I obliged.
Sunday I spent the day taxiing Maddi from study group to baby-sitting to the WWE No Way Out (I still don't get the whole love for wrestling) party. For [my] $10 share of the pay-per-view premier-- I got a play-by-play recap of each match on the car ride home. I personally prefer the female wrestlers...they are like legalized prostitution without the intercourse, dressed all in there hot sexy little latex numbers tossing each other around. Then again maybe they are actresses not yet good enough for the soap opera arena. I also had four seventh grade girls slumbering in the basement. They were as loud as a Friday night in a crowded bar. Four girls so loud for two hours and then, suddenly, silence. Oh to be a giddy teenage girl all over again.
Then there is today. Hail to the chiefs of past--especially George and Abe who we honor most on this day of no banking or mail delivery. I plan to remain in pajamas for as long as I can. Maybe do a little laundry. Read. Then catch up on my TV--Scott Baio 46 and Pregnant and My Fair Brady...Maybe Baby. Reality TV at its best. (hear me laughing) So in honor of presidents past I thank you for the day off from life.
Saturday I spend the day sleeping. The whole day sleeping. While everyone I come in contact with seems to have some form of the flu which accompanies a fever...I have escaped the fever part but the head congestion and unexplainable fatigue did not pass me by. So, after my nearly 24-hour nap I feel like a peach again. My body just was screaming to shut down. I obliged.
Sunday I spent the day taxiing Maddi from study group to baby-sitting to the WWE No Way Out (I still don't get the whole love for wrestling) party. For [my] $10 share of the pay-per-view premier-- I got a play-by-play recap of each match on the car ride home. I personally prefer the female wrestlers...they are like legalized prostitution without the intercourse, dressed all in there hot sexy little latex numbers tossing each other around. Then again maybe they are actresses not yet good enough for the soap opera arena. I also had four seventh grade girls slumbering in the basement. They were as loud as a Friday night in a crowded bar. Four girls so loud for two hours and then, suddenly, silence. Oh to be a giddy teenage girl all over again.
Then there is today. Hail to the chiefs of past--especially George and Abe who we honor most on this day of no banking or mail delivery. I plan to remain in pajamas for as long as I can. Maybe do a little laundry. Read. Then catch up on my TV--Scott Baio 46 and Pregnant and My Fair Brady...Maybe Baby. Reality TV at its best. (hear me laughing) So in honor of presidents past I thank you for the day off from life.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Valentine Re-enactment
Twenty-one years ago King Ralph purposed on this day. So this past weekend while I was at Union Station (the location of the proposal) I re-enacted the moment for all the kids.
Per the instructions of King Ralph under the glow of the moon, I closed my eyes, tossed a penny over my shoulder into the pond and made a wish. I had to say the wish out loud. My wish was someday we would get married. So when I opened my eyes and there he stood with diamond ring in hand I was flabbergasted. A surprise I did not expect--but did not resist the answer of "yes".
Today was another Valentine surprise--I honestly feel that Valentine's Day is a woman's holiday, so I didn't feel to bad that all I got King Ralph was a Barack Obama card-- I got diamond earrings. I was not expecting to be spoiled in such fashion. I lost one of my diamond earrings; I think down the shower drain several weeks ago, that I have had for 15 years. King Ralph handed them to me in a Victoria Secret bag. I was like, ooooh Victoria Secrets...M being the usual quick wit says, “he tore the free panty card from a magazine". Turned out King Ralph was just rummaging in closets for anything that resembled gift-wrap. To accompany the ear jewels was the sweetest card.
Anyone can catch your eye, but it takes someone special to catch your heart. ~Author Unknown
King Ralph caught my heart!
Then I proceeded to crawl back to the couch with my headache and fatigued body--I work not at a school these days but in an infirmary--and it is catching up to me.
Happy V.D
Per the instructions of King Ralph under the glow of the moon, I closed my eyes, tossed a penny over my shoulder into the pond and made a wish. I had to say the wish out loud. My wish was someday we would get married. So when I opened my eyes and there he stood with diamond ring in hand I was flabbergasted. A surprise I did not expect--but did not resist the answer of "yes".
Today was another Valentine surprise--I honestly feel that Valentine's Day is a woman's holiday, so I didn't feel to bad that all I got King Ralph was a Barack Obama card-- I got diamond earrings. I was not expecting to be spoiled in such fashion. I lost one of my diamond earrings; I think down the shower drain several weeks ago, that I have had for 15 years. King Ralph handed them to me in a Victoria Secret bag. I was like, ooooh Victoria Secrets...M being the usual quick wit says, “he tore the free panty card from a magazine". Turned out King Ralph was just rummaging in closets for anything that resembled gift-wrap. To accompany the ear jewels was the sweetest card.
Anyone can catch your eye, but it takes someone special to catch your heart. ~Author Unknown
King Ralph caught my heart!
Then I proceeded to crawl back to the couch with my headache and fatigued body--I work not at a school these days but in an infirmary--and it is catching up to me.
Happy V.D
Saturday, February 09, 2008
Jumping for Jesus
We took the Youth Group downtown to the Survive Dare 2 Share convention. It was a gathering of Christians of all faiths--although as the conservative Lutherans who witness faith in a quieter fashion, God certainly did plop us down into a mosh pit of born again Christians. No offense meant I respect everyone’s denomination of faith and how those chose to express it. Some of the messages expressed--our group just didn't jive with. This doesn't mean that fun was not had, because it certainly was. It brings up questions that young people need to answer. Some speakers grasped the attention (like ex-Colts linebacker Derwin Gray) more than others and the Christian rock bands got claps and cheers. Lives were touched.
I have to say that the after lunch sex presentation left Steve (my leader partner) and I a little scared. I mean an amish dude popping out of a box with an accordian rapping about STD's and crotch bugs that make you itch was just a bit too much for us. I understand the need to preach to teens that their bodies are there temples and deserve to be treated as such. Just not by the use of a amish dude rapping about disease and crotch bugs. Why an amish dude? (I keep hearing Steve's voice in my head as I type saying "ooooh brother") Then the speaker went on to tell the kids how their parents are having "hot sex" and "lots of it all the time"--because that is what "married" people do. Truth lays there--the married part, not necessarily the hot or all the time. I was doing okay with the idea that my girls didn't think there parents did it at all--or just three times.
Then I began to feel like I was no longer at a convention and suddenly plopped down into a revival. I dare to share. I have no problem telling someone I believe in Christ. So when the convention asked the attendees to go door to door collecting canned goods followed by the question "do you know where you are going next, heaven or hell"--we declined, felt it was not our youth groups calling. Really if someone came to my door asking me such a question I would think coo-coo, nut-so in the neighborhood. When we returned after "our" long break of picture taking and pizza, we got to hear people witness the experiences they had of "saving" people through the can good collection. I don't know if I should call myself cynical for thinking this but...I really don't believe that you can ask someone for a can good donation ask them if they are going to heaven or hell, preach the gospel on the door step and suddenly you stand before a person saved through Christ or canned corn. Isn't going from a non-believer to a believer a journey? Well, that is what I believe. So, when the young man got up and said he witnessed "five salvations" by the mere passing off of chicken noodle soup in a can...I started to feel in my heart something was being lost in translation here. Very well someone may have been down and out that day, the faces on there door step may have given cause to reevaluate life but to say one person witnessed the salvation of five lives....
Instead we decided God's calling for us was to bond. Just be silly, crazy and have some fun. So we call this one--Jumping for Jesus.
THE GIRLS
THE GUYS
THOSE THAT LEAD
THE FACE OF TWO WEARY CRAZED ADULTS
I have to say that the after lunch sex presentation left Steve (my leader partner) and I a little scared. I mean an amish dude popping out of a box with an accordian rapping about STD's and crotch bugs that make you itch was just a bit too much for us. I understand the need to preach to teens that their bodies are there temples and deserve to be treated as such. Just not by the use of a amish dude rapping about disease and crotch bugs. Why an amish dude? (I keep hearing Steve's voice in my head as I type saying "ooooh brother") Then the speaker went on to tell the kids how their parents are having "hot sex" and "lots of it all the time"--because that is what "married" people do. Truth lays there--the married part, not necessarily the hot or all the time. I was doing okay with the idea that my girls didn't think there parents did it at all--or just three times.
Then I began to feel like I was no longer at a convention and suddenly plopped down into a revival. I dare to share. I have no problem telling someone I believe in Christ. So when the convention asked the attendees to go door to door collecting canned goods followed by the question "do you know where you are going next, heaven or hell"--we declined, felt it was not our youth groups calling. Really if someone came to my door asking me such a question I would think coo-coo, nut-so in the neighborhood. When we returned after "our" long break of picture taking and pizza, we got to hear people witness the experiences they had of "saving" people through the can good collection. I don't know if I should call myself cynical for thinking this but...I really don't believe that you can ask someone for a can good donation ask them if they are going to heaven or hell, preach the gospel on the door step and suddenly you stand before a person saved through Christ or canned corn. Isn't going from a non-believer to a believer a journey? Well, that is what I believe. So, when the young man got up and said he witnessed "five salvations" by the mere passing off of chicken noodle soup in a can...I started to feel in my heart something was being lost in translation here. Very well someone may have been down and out that day, the faces on there door step may have given cause to reevaluate life but to say one person witnessed the salvation of five lives....
Instead we decided God's calling for us was to bond. Just be silly, crazy and have some fun. So we call this one--Jumping for Jesus.
THE GIRLS
THE GUYS
THOSE THAT LEAD
THE FACE OF TWO WEARY CRAZED ADULTS
Thursday, February 07, 2008
A Loss for Title
While King Ralph lays on the couch surrounded by used Kleenex and pill bottles--occasionally we dip him and the things his flu ridden body touches in Lysol...life shows a worse picture.
There is nothing harder for me to absorb than the killing of cops in the neighboring community to the one that employs King Ralph. A community with a picture perfect suburban atmosphere...landscaped schools,museums, boutiques, restaraunts-- a community were "things" like this shouldn't happen. Sadly the world has no boundaries for where crime touches. The word to describe tonight is "disbelief".
Then I think could this be our family? It very well could be. We hope not. Never. It is days like this, sadly, that remind me why I always have dirty laundry piled up. Dirty white undershirts that smell a scent of Sgt. Sausage Fingers. Because I never know if the day may come when I won't be able to smell the skin but, instead bury my face into the white T-shirt to take in a scent I love so dearly. As a wife/mom I sit here in sadness for the families that answered the doors to the knock no police officer's family wants to open up for. Tonight is a night when God's love is certainly in high demand.
There is nothing harder for me to absorb than the killing of cops in the neighboring community to the one that employs King Ralph. A community with a picture perfect suburban atmosphere...landscaped schools,museums, boutiques, restaraunts-- a community were "things" like this shouldn't happen. Sadly the world has no boundaries for where crime touches. The word to describe tonight is "disbelief".
Then I think could this be our family? It very well could be. We hope not. Never. It is days like this, sadly, that remind me why I always have dirty laundry piled up. Dirty white undershirts that smell a scent of Sgt. Sausage Fingers. Because I never know if the day may come when I won't be able to smell the skin but, instead bury my face into the white T-shirt to take in a scent I love so dearly. As a wife/mom I sit here in sadness for the families that answered the doors to the knock no police officer's family wants to open up for. Tonight is a night when God's love is certainly in high demand.
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
SUPER TUESDAY
I really do suffer from electile dysfunction--when the 2008 candidates fail to arouse. Regardless I am heading to the shower...so I smell good when I cast my vote...because my vote counts...it matters.
Monday, February 04, 2008
Army Insects, Sensible Shoes & Politics
Way to go G-I-ants! We had a full house last night...and full stomachs. No New England fans allowed. Before we all respectfully--with patriotism and honor to our country—rose, removed hats and sang the national anthem Optic Man called his bookie and we all placed bets. I never knew Optic Man had a bookie but lucky for us he was giving a 12-point spread which made us feel more at ease to cough up $50 that turned into a $100. For the half time show we demonstrated our love of the half time show by lowering the lights, opening our cell phones and singing along with Tom Petty--"Free Falling." (I am going to resurrect my Tom Petty CD).
Dave the night custodian refers to my brown leather alligator skin like boots as my dominatrix boots. I disagree. They are instead totally fashionable. The fashioneesta daughters after all approved them--it can't be better than that for a mom. Today however I might have to question there work style wear. I was doing my lunch duty, wiping a table after the kindergarten class was dismissed...I slipped on a red grape...I went down. Feet up in the air, slamming butt down on the tiled floor. My ego remains in tact since the only one keen enough to pay a bit of attention to me was my little brother. Which he did not refrain from laughing and commenting on the poor choice in footwear. Sensible shoes? I say bologna. Women have bled more for fashion than by wearing my fashionable, stylish, I-love-m boots. It was totally the fault of the red grape...maybe I will go as far as to say the kid who brought the red grapes in the lunch box.
I just answered the phone...it was an automated political campaign announcement...help me understand here how John McCain being a "millionaire" has anything to do with his stance on abortion rights or Huckabee's need to tell me this during one of his campaign blitz? It is nice to know that Huckabee has always been true to his Pro-Life belief but his automated message that has to throw in that McCain is a millionaire has NOTHING to do with Pro-Life or Pro-Choice. Aaaaaahhhhh! Please don't waste my time with hidden mudslinging.
If you'll excuse me it's time for dinner. Super-Bowl-the-Giants-won-leftovers.
Dave the night custodian refers to my brown leather alligator skin like boots as my dominatrix boots. I disagree. They are instead totally fashionable. The fashioneesta daughters after all approved them--it can't be better than that for a mom. Today however I might have to question there work style wear. I was doing my lunch duty, wiping a table after the kindergarten class was dismissed...I slipped on a red grape...I went down. Feet up in the air, slamming butt down on the tiled floor. My ego remains in tact since the only one keen enough to pay a bit of attention to me was my little brother. Which he did not refrain from laughing and commenting on the poor choice in footwear. Sensible shoes? I say bologna. Women have bled more for fashion than by wearing my fashionable, stylish, I-love-m boots. It was totally the fault of the red grape...maybe I will go as far as to say the kid who brought the red grapes in the lunch box.
I just answered the phone...it was an automated political campaign announcement...help me understand here how John McCain being a "millionaire" has anything to do with his stance on abortion rights or Huckabee's need to tell me this during one of his campaign blitz? It is nice to know that Huckabee has always been true to his Pro-Life belief but his automated message that has to throw in that McCain is a millionaire has NOTHING to do with Pro-Life or Pro-Choice. Aaaaaahhhhh! Please don't waste my time with hidden mudslinging.
If you'll excuse me it's time for dinner. Super-Bowl-the-Giants-won-leftovers.
Saturday, February 02, 2008
Winter Funland
It almost seems like we have had more sizeable snow falls this year than in winters past. I can't remember the last winter when we were able to go sledding two months in a row.
Last month when we went sledding King Ralph stood at the top of the hill dressed as Sgt. Sausage Fingers admiring our sledding talents. This snow fall he joined us. Well, really he tried to join us...turns out he has lost his aero dynamics. The girls were looking for mud tracks on the bottom of the sled. The grooves his sled left in the snow as it putted down the hill were like no other. Poor guy, as much as he wanted to play snow dad he just doesn't have the talent.
Instead he gave the girls a shove for a bullet ride down the hill...
Then the wipe out...
When you lose your aero dynamics you make a great target...
Just to prove I am a mom who always joins in the fun...
While holding a smile...
Last month when we went sledding King Ralph stood at the top of the hill dressed as Sgt. Sausage Fingers admiring our sledding talents. This snow fall he joined us. Well, really he tried to join us...turns out he has lost his aero dynamics. The girls were looking for mud tracks on the bottom of the sled. The grooves his sled left in the snow as it putted down the hill were like no other. Poor guy, as much as he wanted to play snow dad he just doesn't have the talent.
Instead he gave the girls a shove for a bullet ride down the hill...
Then the wipe out...
When you lose your aero dynamics you make a great target...
Just to prove I am a mom who always joins in the fun...
While holding a smile...
Friday, February 01, 2008
Snow Day
I can't be certain if it was the ice cubes that were flushed down the toilets or if it was the orange (still) in the freezer, regardless it's a SNOW DAY!
What do you do when you get a snow day from work and school? I wake at the usual 5am then slip back to bed around 7am and sleep till 10am, snuggled in my bed with the heated mattress cover--is winter perfect. Two of the three girls are awake. A princess it seems needs more beauty rest--then the rest of us. I think I will wash my kitchen floor. Maybe do a few loads of laundry. I will make my super bowl party grocery list. By the look of my unplowed neighborhood street getting out of here to go sledding is going to be a bit of a challange. When they do finally "free" us--I have the sleds by the door, and a thermos ready to fill with hot cocoa.
Who doesn't love a snow day?!
*****
3pm Have you ever lived across the street from a neighbor who has a perfectly manicured lawn? The flowers are planted and arranged to resemble the botanical gardens? Or likes to come out with his freaking snow blower while you are out digging your concrete driveway free with a shovel (or two)? I live across the street from that neighbor. I think we all wanted to give him the finger--even though he is a great neighbor-- as he easily blew the eight inches of snow not only from his driveway but down the sidewalk; in both directions. It is like he waits till we have shovel in hand to blow his snow. His silent way of saying my life is easier today than yours. Son of a...Son of a...Son of a gun. I'm being a nice neighbor.
What do you do when you get a snow day from work and school? I wake at the usual 5am then slip back to bed around 7am and sleep till 10am, snuggled in my bed with the heated mattress cover--is winter perfect. Two of the three girls are awake. A princess it seems needs more beauty rest--then the rest of us. I think I will wash my kitchen floor. Maybe do a few loads of laundry. I will make my super bowl party grocery list. By the look of my unplowed neighborhood street getting out of here to go sledding is going to be a bit of a challange. When they do finally "free" us--I have the sleds by the door, and a thermos ready to fill with hot cocoa.
Who doesn't love a snow day?!
*****
3pm Have you ever lived across the street from a neighbor who has a perfectly manicured lawn? The flowers are planted and arranged to resemble the botanical gardens? Or likes to come out with his freaking snow blower while you are out digging your concrete driveway free with a shovel (or two)? I live across the street from that neighbor. I think we all wanted to give him the finger--even though he is a great neighbor-- as he easily blew the eight inches of snow not only from his driveway but down the sidewalk; in both directions. It is like he waits till we have shovel in hand to blow his snow. His silent way of saying my life is easier today than yours. Son of a...Son of a...Son of a gun. I'm being a nice neighbor.
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Steakburger, Fries with a Side of Snow Day
I was in the office doing what you do in an office when our only office wise guy walks in says to me "get a new job at Steak-n-Shake." Ha-ha. I was simply wearing black low ride wide leg trousers and a white puffy three-quarter length sleeve button up shirt--for that I get a comment that I look like a Steak-n-Shake employee. All this coming from a guy who has been wearing the same shirt for four years. Then my little brother walks in the office and says "sister you working at Steak-n-Shake now"...turns out he is now a causality of being employed in the same building. Then I walk out in the hall when another male co-worker arrives and he looks at me and says, "I'll take a steakburger and a side of fries". These guys think they are funny. Later in the day I was in the cafeteria doing my lunch duty, three guys from the shop poke there heads out and holler "we would like steakburgers and strawberry shakes". I could smell brother written all over that one! I swear I am going to wear that same outfit to work in a few weeks but accessorize it with a genuine Steak-n-Shake hat. If I didn't start work before Steak-n-Shake opened I would stop and buy the sassy boys all shakes.
The snow has been falling nearly all day. You forget quickly how exciting snow falling during a school day is till you start working in an elementary school--I was pleasantly refreshed. I also learned a few new tricks to guarantee a snow day tomorrow. So excuse me while I end here to put on my PJ's inside out and backwards, put an orange in the freezer, place a spoon under my pillow and lastly, flush an ice cube down the toilet at 6pm. Don't ask me what all this silliness symbolizes or the meanings behind it all...just know I going with it! Feel free to join me.
Princess A just burst in the kitchen, opened the freezer, grabbed an ice cube (all in haste) and said "quick it is six o'clock I need to flush a cube." Then D follows suit, grabs a cube and runs to her bathroom. I can hear toilets flushing with ice cubes clanking as they spiral down the drains.
Come on snow day!
The snow has been falling nearly all day. You forget quickly how exciting snow falling during a school day is till you start working in an elementary school--I was pleasantly refreshed. I also learned a few new tricks to guarantee a snow day tomorrow. So excuse me while I end here to put on my PJ's inside out and backwards, put an orange in the freezer, place a spoon under my pillow and lastly, flush an ice cube down the toilet at 6pm. Don't ask me what all this silliness symbolizes or the meanings behind it all...just know I going with it! Feel free to join me.
Princess A just burst in the kitchen, opened the freezer, grabbed an ice cube (all in haste) and said "quick it is six o'clock I need to flush a cube." Then D follows suit, grabs a cube and runs to her bathroom. I can hear toilets flushing with ice cubes clanking as they spiral down the drains.
Come on snow day!
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Pressures
It seems my blog has fallen into the hands of a fellow co-worker. Not an office worker but an educator. Oddly enough she doesn't know I know that she has been entertaining herself with all my silly anecdotes. You have no idea now the pressure I feel to eliminate all grammatical, punctuation, spelling, moment in writing where I ramble adding or omitting a needless word--basically all mistakes that a red pen could strike. I feel like one day I will walk in the mail room and one of my blog entries will be in my box with a request for corrections to be made and the grade to be given when I re-post the edited copy.
Let's step back to yesterday. It was the most gorgeous January day, 73*. Then suddenly the cold front moved in and the temperature dropped 50* in a matter of hours. I believe I was prancing around in a bikini at recess duty at noon (okay that is an exaggeration because I wouldn't want to make others jealous, or scare them. You pick which it is) and leaving the building wearing a parka with my head wrapped in a babushka. This morning it is 12*. This winter weather is going crazy! Global warming. the pressure of wearing the correct coat and proper shoes. Aaaaaahhhhhh!
Let's step back to yesterday. It was the most gorgeous January day, 73*. Then suddenly the cold front moved in and the temperature dropped 50* in a matter of hours. I believe I was prancing around in a bikini at recess duty at noon (okay that is an exaggeration because I wouldn't want to make others jealous, or scare them. You pick which it is) and leaving the building wearing a parka with my head wrapped in a babushka. This morning it is 12*. This winter weather is going crazy! Global warming. the pressure of wearing the correct coat and proper shoes. Aaaaaahhhhhh!
Friday, January 25, 2008
Make Me Laugh
I don't know about you but laughing is totally invigorating.
Here are a few of the things that made me laugh today...
King Ralph returning from the doctor asks me to scratch his back while he tells me all the medications they prescribed to him then says "and the doctor said you need to do that more." "More what" I said "scratching on your back?" His reply of yes just didn't soak in much as a doctor's order. Try again King Ralph! In the King's next life he is coming back as a dog. This way he can roll over with his legs in the air while his fool owner scratches his belly. I am just plain tired of the constant need of his to be scratched. Twenty-one years of back scratching is time served well--isn't it?
Just now my new cell phone (which to date is proving to be a better relationship between myself and the phone than the &^%%$#* pink razor cell phone was) rang, it was a call from Princess A. M made me unique ring tones for each of the family members. When Princess A calls you can hear M's voice saying "princess-princess-princess-princess-princess." Oh brother. If it isn't bad enough that she thinks she is a princess, now the world gets to hear it every time she calls.
Now I am going to watch Mr. Woodcock and see if I can laugh a little more tonight.
Here are a few of the things that made me laugh today...
King Ralph returning from the doctor asks me to scratch his back while he tells me all the medications they prescribed to him then says "and the doctor said you need to do that more." "More what" I said "scratching on your back?" His reply of yes just didn't soak in much as a doctor's order. Try again King Ralph! In the King's next life he is coming back as a dog. This way he can roll over with his legs in the air while his fool owner scratches his belly. I am just plain tired of the constant need of his to be scratched. Twenty-one years of back scratching is time served well--isn't it?
Just now my new cell phone (which to date is proving to be a better relationship between myself and the phone than the &^%%$#* pink razor cell phone was) rang, it was a call from Princess A. M made me unique ring tones for each of the family members. When Princess A calls you can hear M's voice saying "princess-princess-princess-princess-princess." Oh brother. If it isn't bad enough that she thinks she is a princess, now the world gets to hear it every time she calls.
Now I am going to watch Mr. Woodcock and see if I can laugh a little more tonight.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Another Hump Day Entry
Fear not I am still around. It's only been a week. I was thinking where have I been that I have neglected my blog. Here are some of the reasons I came up with:
A. Recovering from last Friday's finale performance of South Pacific...what will probably go down in [my] history as the most painful middle school experience. Then again my friend's husband told me at intermission it was suggested to him by another dad to drink before attending. Or was it my brother's comment "that is three hours of my life I will never get back" that affirmed the pain that only I thought I was feeling. All kidding aside the kids did a nice job with a not-so-great musical choice.
B. Drowning in laundry. I have begun to think there is something positive in being a nudist--little laundry, fewer laods. (I'm not sure the family will go for the idea)
C. Cleaning up after last Saturday's game night. We feasted. We toasted. We gamed. Fun-fun-fun. However, we will have to draw straws from now on for who gets "Optic Man" on their team. A man with a magnifying glass to read the Catch Phrase clues slows the whole process of winning down.
D. Maybe I should just go with the fact that it is pretty darn cold this week...that it is easier to toss on my flannel PJ's, turn on the fire place, and snuggle under a comforter, while watching mindless reality shows like; Scott Baio 46 and Pregnant & My Fair Brady...Maybe Baby?, than to write.
I think I will go with, the answer is D.
A. Recovering from last Friday's finale performance of South Pacific...what will probably go down in [my] history as the most painful middle school experience. Then again my friend's husband told me at intermission it was suggested to him by another dad to drink before attending. Or was it my brother's comment "that is three hours of my life I will never get back" that affirmed the pain that only I thought I was feeling. All kidding aside the kids did a nice job with a not-so-great musical choice.
B. Drowning in laundry. I have begun to think there is something positive in being a nudist--little laundry, fewer laods. (I'm not sure the family will go for the idea)
C. Cleaning up after last Saturday's game night. We feasted. We toasted. We gamed. Fun-fun-fun. However, we will have to draw straws from now on for who gets "Optic Man" on their team. A man with a magnifying glass to read the Catch Phrase clues slows the whole process of winning down.
D. Maybe I should just go with the fact that it is pretty darn cold this week...that it is easier to toss on my flannel PJ's, turn on the fire place, and snuggle under a comforter, while watching mindless reality shows like; Scott Baio 46 and Pregnant & My Fair Brady...Maybe Baby?, than to write.
I think I will go with, the answer is D.
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Hump Day (I'm talking middle of the week, you sick minds)
I am having one of those days when I would like to have diarrhea mouth by letting what is eating at my craw just spew out...but I know that really serves no purpose.
Instead I called from the driveway, as I arrived home early from work, to summons D outside with that Project Graduation Ice Cream Day fundraiser flyer. In this case, not chocolate but, ice cream from Baskin Robbins calms the spirit--while donating to a good cause.
Then I came home and tossed pot roast on the stove. I can smell the fresh thyme and rosemary infusing the beef. Comfort food. Today is a day for comfort foods.
Then I finished making college visit reservations so the Princess can make her final higher education choice. I vote for the college that has offered the most scholarship monies. Of course she votes for the one that would have us selling the family home and cars...having us live in a mobile home (single wide not double) and riding the bi-state bus.
Last night had a moment when I regretted whacking all my hair off. Thankfully this morning I woke up realizing my Katie Holmes inspired hair was really good. Now I have to refute the teacher who commented to me today, "your hair is so cute you are like a super model". SUPER MODEL? I think not! Not only would I need to grow another 7 inches to even be allowed to stare at the cat walk but the crater wrinkle between my brow that is screaming for a collegian injection would toss me from the cover of AARP so fast...well you know what I mean.
Tonight I am going to get my watch fixed so I can sit around watching the time till the snow begins to fall. I am also going to get a new cell phone. You have no idea how long I have been marking the calendar days till I can dispose of this miserable pink-razor-I-never-work-phone. I just might, in celebration, place the devil under my car tire and run over it.
That my friends is my Wednesday in a nut shell.
Instead I called from the driveway, as I arrived home early from work, to summons D outside with that Project Graduation Ice Cream Day fundraiser flyer. In this case, not chocolate but, ice cream from Baskin Robbins calms the spirit--while donating to a good cause.
Then I came home and tossed pot roast on the stove. I can smell the fresh thyme and rosemary infusing the beef. Comfort food. Today is a day for comfort foods.
Then I finished making college visit reservations so the Princess can make her final higher education choice. I vote for the college that has offered the most scholarship monies. Of course she votes for the one that would have us selling the family home and cars...having us live in a mobile home (single wide not double) and riding the bi-state bus.
Last night had a moment when I regretted whacking all my hair off. Thankfully this morning I woke up realizing my Katie Holmes inspired hair was really good. Now I have to refute the teacher who commented to me today, "your hair is so cute you are like a super model". SUPER MODEL? I think not! Not only would I need to grow another 7 inches to even be allowed to stare at the cat walk but the crater wrinkle between my brow that is screaming for a collegian injection would toss me from the cover of AARP so fast...well you know what I mean.
Tonight I am going to get my watch fixed so I can sit around watching the time till the snow begins to fall. I am also going to get a new cell phone. You have no idea how long I have been marking the calendar days till I can dispose of this miserable pink-razor-I-never-work-phone. I just might, in celebration, place the devil under my car tire and run over it.
That my friends is my Wednesday in a nut shell.
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Not Hip? Who Says?
Last night King Ralph, M and I went to the RV Show at the America's Center. Since some fool who lacked in judgement decided he wanted to cross the highway on foot (at rush hour), which resulted in death, the highway was shut down--detour route necessary.
Our detour took us down Washington Ave., St. Louis's loft district-- the area King Ralph and I dream to one day live. We already shook on it that if two of the three girls move out of state we promised each other to sell the house and live in a loft. So as we drove through the loft district, which was brimming with Friday night life, M says "this area is really hip". I said to her "this is were Mom and Dad want to live one day. How would feel about your older parents strolling down the streets mixed in with all these younger people?" Then M with her usual wit says "well you better get your hip replacements early"
Just when I thought my freshly chopped hair ala Victoria Beckham/Katie Holmes added a hip edge to me, my own flesh and blood slams me to the ground. Teenagers.
Our detour took us down Washington Ave., St. Louis's loft district-- the area King Ralph and I dream to one day live. We already shook on it that if two of the three girls move out of state we promised each other to sell the house and live in a loft. So as we drove through the loft district, which was brimming with Friday night life, M says "this area is really hip". I said to her "this is were Mom and Dad want to live one day. How would feel about your older parents strolling down the streets mixed in with all these younger people?" Then M with her usual wit says "well you better get your hip replacements early"
Just when I thought my freshly chopped hair ala Victoria Beckham/Katie Holmes added a hip edge to me, my own flesh and blood slams me to the ground. Teenagers.
Thursday, January 10, 2008
South Pacific
Tonight was round one for Demi as the Professor in the middle school musical, South Pacific.
Due to the lack of award shows on TV due to the current writers strike I am awarding, here at Keeper of the House... Best Actress to Miss Cory for her portrayal of Bloody Mary... Best Supporting Actress goes to Miss Jessica for her portrayal of Luther Biliss... Medal of Courage is awarded to every young man in the play who dared to, try to sing in the midst of a developing Adams Apple. (In the words of Princess A, "be nice", I will not fully express the pain I felt each time the young men attempted tune.)
Due to the lack of award shows on TV due to the current writers strike I am awarding, here at Keeper of the House... Best Actress to Miss Cory for her portrayal of Bloody Mary... Best Supporting Actress goes to Miss Jessica for her portrayal of Luther Biliss... Medal of Courage is awarded to every young man in the play who dared to, try to sing in the midst of a developing Adams Apple. (In the words of Princess A, "be nice", I will not fully express the pain I felt each time the young men attempted tune.)
Wednesday, January 09, 2008
Mardi Gras On Hold
I have no idea what in MO's mind would cause this state to schedule the Primary Elections on Fat Tuesday? Except maybe to lend hand to cause and reason to drink, over eat and celebrate (for some) all at the same time.
I got D's confirmation newsletter today alerting that the confirmation class's annual Fat Tuesday or as we Lutherans refer to it as, Shrove Tuesday, Pancake Supper is being canceled. Canceled because the election commission basically owns the church’s fellowship hall on Fat Tuesday. Isn’t there some sort of law about separation of church and state—if it interferes with Fat Tuesday?
So just to air my political standing I am going to divulge now...not who I plan to cast my vote for but just the party I wish to stand with—for now:
I got D's confirmation newsletter today alerting that the confirmation class's annual Fat Tuesday or as we Lutherans refer to it as, Shrove Tuesday, Pancake Supper is being canceled. Canceled because the election commission basically owns the church’s fellowship hall on Fat Tuesday. Isn’t there some sort of law about separation of church and state—if it interferes with Fat Tuesday?
So just to air my political standing I am going to divulge now...not who I plan to cast my vote for but just the party I wish to stand with—for now:
Monday, January 07, 2008
The Wilds of the Playground
In order to protect the identity of the student I will refer to her as Miss X
Today while I was performing my lunch recess duty Miss X decided we should bond through conversation. Here is how our conversation went...
Miss X: Do you have any boys at your house?
Me: No. I have three girls.
Miss X: What are there names?
Me: Alee, that's her name not a nickname, who is a senior. Madison, who we call Maddi, is a freshman and Demi who is in seventh grade.
Miss X: Demi, that is a unique name.
Me: Demi is named for a movie star,Demi Moore.
Miss X: I like the name Alicia. I think that is pretty.
Me: yes it is
Enters Miss X's friend to the conversation
Friend: I like the name Brittany
Me: Oh no I do not care much for that name, it makes me think Brittany Spears and then...well then I get sick to my stomach.
Miss X: Did you know Jamie Lynn Spears is pregnant and she's sixteen.
Me: Yes I did know. Not a good choice she made.
Miss X: How do you get pregnant?
Conversation had a slight sound of a car wreck
Me: I think that is a conversation that you should have with your mom.
Miss X: Really how do you get pregnant?
Me: Really honey I think you should ask your mom.
Miss X: Why won't you tell me?
Friend: They aren't allowed to tell us things like that at school.
Miss X: Mrs. Avery you have three of them (meaning kids) so you know how it happens.
And I was officially left speechless.
If the month of October with the third graders begging me to tell the truth if Santa is real, it continued into November and December. But I never dreamed in a million years that January would be the month I would be summoned to teach Sex Ed under the monkey bars. I may need to go back and read the fine print in my employment contract...wondering what February has in store.
Today while I was performing my lunch recess duty Miss X decided we should bond through conversation. Here is how our conversation went...
Miss X: Do you have any boys at your house?
Me: No. I have three girls.
Miss X: What are there names?
Me: Alee, that's her name not a nickname, who is a senior. Madison, who we call Maddi, is a freshman and Demi who is in seventh grade.
Miss X: Demi, that is a unique name.
Me: Demi is named for a movie star,Demi Moore.
Miss X: I like the name Alicia. I think that is pretty.
Me: yes it is
Enters Miss X's friend to the conversation
Friend: I like the name Brittany
Me: Oh no I do not care much for that name, it makes me think Brittany Spears and then...well then I get sick to my stomach.
Miss X: Did you know Jamie Lynn Spears is pregnant and she's sixteen.
Me: Yes I did know. Not a good choice she made.
Miss X: How do you get pregnant?
Conversation had a slight sound of a car wreck
Me: I think that is a conversation that you should have with your mom.
Miss X: Really how do you get pregnant?
Me: Really honey I think you should ask your mom.
Miss X: Why won't you tell me?
Friend: They aren't allowed to tell us things like that at school.
Miss X: Mrs. Avery you have three of them (meaning kids) so you know how it happens.
And I was officially left speechless.
If the month of October with the third graders begging me to tell the truth if Santa is real, it continued into November and December. But I never dreamed in a million years that January would be the month I would be summoned to teach Sex Ed under the monkey bars. I may need to go back and read the fine print in my employment contract...wondering what February has in store.
Tuesday, January 01, 2008
A Doghter's Resolution
I have firm belief that resolutions is just a pathway for disappointment. To safe guard myself from self-inflicted failure and disappointment I do not make resolutions. Instead I take the year as it rolls, bouncing along and taking the punches, fighting back when necessary...sometimes choosing to just rollover and play dead.
This year however, Uli decided she needed to make a resolution...to never let her human sister style her hair like this ever-ever-again!
This year however, Uli decided she needed to make a resolution...to never let her human sister style her hair like this ever-ever-again!
It's a toss up between a Gremlin look or Don King.
Monday, December 31, 2007
Farwell 2007 Hello 2008
I am creating one last culinary creation with feasts 2007 leftovers--turkey tetrazzeni.
Here is how we will each say farewell to 2007--a year that had its lows but ended on the highest of highs-- and welcome in 2008:
Princess A will host a party.
Uli & I will chaperone the party.
King Ralph will drive around busting parties.
D will "lock-in" to a party.
M will party and then, maybe, for a bit, slumber.
Happy New Year!
Here is how we will each say farewell to 2007--a year that had its lows but ended on the highest of highs-- and welcome in 2008:
Princess A will host a party.
Uli & I will chaperone the party.
King Ralph will drive around busting parties.
D will "lock-in" to a party.
M will party and then, maybe, for a bit, slumber.
Happy New Year!
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Oops!
Our friends called today...said they couldn't wait another day longer...to thank me for sending them an empty envelope. Not "us" but "me" because, everyone knows King Ralph wouldn't have the patience to address seventy-five envelopes.
That's right people, I spent thirty-seven cents to send a beautiful emerald green Christmas card--minus the card--envelope. Oh well, aren't we all allowed one Christmas blunder? If so that was mine.
I certainly hope that when they unsealed that emerald green envelope the spirit of Christmas and the joy of the season I sprinkled inside swelled the room.
That's right people, I spent thirty-seven cents to send a beautiful emerald green Christmas card--minus the card--envelope. Oh well, aren't we all allowed one Christmas blunder? If so that was mine.
I certainly hope that when they unsealed that emerald green envelope the spirit of Christmas and the joy of the season I sprinkled inside swelled the room.
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Call me a Vixen, party girl, hostess extraodiaire, wish me a Merry Christmas and then put me to bed!
What a whirl wind these last five days have been!
It started on Friday afternoon in the reindeer relay where I tried my best to bring a win in for Team Vixen but unfortunately we were taken down by Team Dasher. After a transformation (which included a quick hair dye job) I gussied myself up in festive holiday attire and headed to a wonderful party. I could have stayed all night sipping from the punch bowl of sangria and eating cherry tomato-mozzarella cheese-fresh basil-black olive-on a stick appetizers-- but like any good Cinderella knows when the clock strikes it is time to go.
Saturday was a more casual party with fun cousins, great food, mudslides and trivia games.
Sunday at church for the children's program Demi sang-- well tried -- a solo through an ill voice unable to project her usual sweet harmonic soprano tone. She gets an A for effort. Alee could be heard in the back ground playing the sweet sound of a carol on her flute as the Advent wreath's fourth candle was lit. Then it was home to do some quick bathroom tidies and the family starting pouring in for phase one of DFF (dysfunctional family fun). This divorced parent thing with King Ralph's parents would make the worst married couple want to stay married for the sake of making the holidays for the children simple...pain in the ass! We feasted. Then we opened presents...I just love my gift.
(The King looks grander on the piano than it does in my arms)
Monday, with little sleep, we donned our Christmas outfits and welcomed Christmas Eve...phase two of DFF. King Ralph's mother and her side of the family filled the house for a champagne brunch...or Bloody Mary...or screw driver...coffee and bailey's, spiked nog brunch. We feasted more, again. Then presents flowed. Love and laughter filled our home. We all parted ways, headed to church and remembered why it is Christmas; what we are celebrating. The thing that fills my spirit with Christmas joy is Alee playing Silent Night on the flute while the sanctuary is a glow with hand held candles.
Monday, with little sleep, we donned our Christmas outfits and welcomed Christmas Eve...phase two of DFF. King Ralph's mother and her side of the family filled the house for a champagne brunch...or Bloody Mary...or screw driver...coffee and bailey's, spiked nog brunch. We feasted more, again. Then presents flowed. Love and laughter filled our home. We all parted ways, headed to church and remembered why it is Christmas; what we are celebrating. The thing that fills my spirit with Christmas joy is Alee playing Silent Night on the flute while the sanctuary is a glow with hand held candles.
Tuesday. Sadly, since crime knows no holiday, King Ralph rose, dressed in blues, and headed out the door at 530am. I quickly exited bed, stuffed stocking and dressed the base of the tree in pretty packages with impressive bows. Then I crawled back in bed while carols lulled me back in sleep. The girls and I prepared for the King's arrival at noon--it was a long time drooling over the elegant silver and scarlet red shimmering bows but, finally a figure of blue stepped in and a chorus of girls rang out a boisterous call of... "Merry Christmas, let's open presents". Pretty papers tossed in air to reveal a handy cam, air compressor, digital camera, cell phone, perfumes, a watch, slippers, suede boots for all...but best of all a jump rope (the only thing I said I really wanted). Then in the peaceful joy of Christmas the five of us gathered around the dining room table to show thanks of another bountiful feast-- steak and shrimp -- and raised our glasses (using the G-O-O-D crystal) of asti and sparkling grape juices and toasted to a VERY BLESSED AND MERRY CHRISTMAS!
I hope your Christmas was filled with as much blessings,joy and happiness as we believe ours was. Now, if you don't mind I am going to bed. I am exhausted!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Time For Panic To Set In
I admit I am a bit behind on my usual holiday pace. Those hours in my day that are now consumed by employment--turns out those are valuable personal hours during this month of December.
I picked my cards up today...I had to cross the state line to guarantee all of you a card before the year 2008 rings in. I still have sugar cookies to cut and crescent cookies to bake. I did however make praline pecan crunch with the pecans my dear friend was peddling a few months back. I have my grocery list organized by isles so that should help me to shop rather well...question is what day should I prefer my heart jump started when the checker calls out the dollar amount she wants collected?
Well, I'd like to stay here and chatter nonsense but I really need to squeeze in a little reindeer relay workout.
I picked my cards up today...I had to cross the state line to guarantee all of you a card before the year 2008 rings in. I still have sugar cookies to cut and crescent cookies to bake. I did however make praline pecan crunch with the pecans my dear friend was peddling a few months back. I have my grocery list organized by isles so that should help me to shop rather well...question is what day should I prefer my heart jump started when the checker calls out the dollar amount she wants collected?
Well, I'd like to stay here and chatter nonsense but I really need to squeeze in a little reindeer relay workout.
Monday, December 17, 2007
The Special Thing About This Day
It appears by the clock, that if I let my mind wander back fifteen years, that King Ralph left the hospital to pick up a Blockbuster movie while my water was being broke.
In three and a half hours my sweet and funny M, our "love child", will be fifteen years old.
I hope that she feels I remembered to kiss her and love her enough in these fifteen years to make it recognized how much she was wanted and is truly loved.
Happy Birthday Maddi-Phyl!
In three and a half hours my sweet and funny M, our "love child", will be fifteen years old.
I hope that she feels I remembered to kiss her and love her enough in these fifteen years to make it recognized how much she was wanted and is truly loved.
Happy Birthday Maddi-Phyl!
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Sunday or Funday
We took a usual Sunday and turned into a winter Funday!
We went sledding at the park.
Princess A & M made snow angels
The Princess turned devilish
We went sledding at the park.
Princess A & M made snow angels
The Princess turned devilish
M took the Princess ddddowwwwn with a WWE move
Since they are, after all sisters--they decided one last trip down the hill should be as the trio they are
This was a funday, on a cold afternoon, that warmed our spirits and hearts.
Saturday, December 15, 2007
A Perfect Day
A perfect day--waking to the tranquility of a peaceful house while gazing out the kitchen window at freshly fallen snow. Then with the help of the girls we filled the house with the aromatic scent of fresh baked cookies--my grandmother's Christmas cookies. We sang carols together. D built a snowman in the front yard. To end our "perfect" Saturday we could not resist playing in falling snow with the moon as our lantern...with a photo to remember.
Thursday, December 13, 2007
I am still breathing deep breaths of holiday on-set
I'm still here. I've just been busy shopping, wrapping, going to and hosting parties. I been to so many school musical functions I have my cell phone calendar set to alert me when I attend the next. If you are waiting for our usual Christmas card...well, I have not quite gotten around to that just yet. Soon. I promise. Soon. As for the baking of cookies...this weekend baking will commence.
In my abundance of free time I am in training for next Friday's Reindeer Relay. I will remain unwavering in my preparations to take the place Rudolph. I am sticking to a strict diet of oats and raw carrots, while continuing to perfect my ability to soar at a speed like no reindeer has done before. Tune in next Friday for whatever embarrassing photos may transpire by some crafty, lurking, sideline fellow co-worker.
Till then.......
In my abundance of free time I am in training for next Friday's Reindeer Relay. I will remain unwavering in my preparations to take the place Rudolph. I am sticking to a strict diet of oats and raw carrots, while continuing to perfect my ability to soar at a speed like no reindeer has done before. Tune in next Friday for whatever embarrassing photos may transpire by some crafty, lurking, sideline fellow co-worker.
Till then.......
Friday, December 07, 2007
A Self Holiday Reminder
Myself is telling me...Breathe, deep breaths, sing a carol and go with it all...this week will pass.
It is a week full of holiday cheer.
It is a week full of holiday cheer.
Saturday, December 01, 2007
Yes, I Do Believe
In a world that sadly has lost its ability to celebrate the season--Christmas...in a world that now has abolished Santa's trade mark saying; Ho-Ho-Ho--because it just might offend the "ho" that walks past Santa...in a world that wants to rush our youth from a the magic of believing...I say to you and mostly my third grade friends--Santa is real. Mrs. Avery does believe. No lie. And, I will say it so don't bother asking me if I will offend, because I don't really care--Merry Christmas!
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
one more thing to add to the list
19. I am beginning to get the feeling-- the finding college monies for Princess A feeling.
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