The Wilds of the Playground

In order to protect the identity of the student I will refer to her as Miss X

Today while I was performing my lunch recess duty Miss X decided we should bond through conversation. Here is how our conversation went...

Miss X: Do you have any boys at your house?

Me: No. I have three girls.

Miss X: What are there names?

Me: Alee, that's her name not a nickname, who is a senior. Madison, who we call Maddi, is a freshman and Demi who is in seventh grade.

Miss X: Demi, that is a unique name.

Me: Demi is named for a movie star,Demi Moore.

Miss X: I like the name Alicia. I think that is pretty.

Me: yes it is

Enters Miss X's friend to the conversation

Friend: I like the name Brittany

Me: Oh no I do not care much for that name, it makes me think Brittany Spears and then...well then I get sick to my stomach.

Miss X: Did you know Jamie Lynn Spears is pregnant and she's sixteen.

Me: Yes I did know. Not a good choice she made.

Miss X: How do you get pregnant?

Conversation had a slight sound of a car wreck

Me: I think that is a conversation that you should have with your mom.

Miss X: Really how do you get pregnant?

Me: Really honey I think you should ask your mom.

Miss X: Why won't you tell me?

Friend: They aren't allowed to tell us things like that at school.

Miss X: Mrs. Avery you have three of them (meaning kids) so you know how it happens.

And I was officially left speechless.

If the month of October with the third graders begging me to tell the truth if Santa is real, it continued into November and December. But I never dreamed in a million years that January would be the month I would be summoned to teach Sex Ed under the monkey bars. I may need to go back and read the fine print in my employment contract...wondering what February has in store.