General Observations:

It would take a garden rake and a blow torch to exfoliate me. I question if bathing in a tub of advanced healing lotion could hydrate and heal my extra dry skin. Don't take me to the zoo I could be mistaken for an alligator.

Letting my hair grow out causes mood alterations. This is a time when I should consider hair extensions for the sake of, not only my marriage but the love of my daughters. Do you think it appropriate to wear my pink World Series ball cap 7 days a week? Even to church?

My tread mill has a thick layer of cob webs formed on it--sitting idle since December. This is a situation that requires immediate intervention.

Question:

Should I take my Grateful Dead or my Woodstock CD as I make my whirl wind drive to Indy to retrieve my eBay winning bid item? There is something about the spouse's big blue van required transportation for this trip) that makes me feel so 70's. If the kids were older I might be tempted to put a bumper sticker on it that says "if this van is a rockin don't come a knockin".

...for those of you dying to know what my bid got me, well you'll just have wait to see!