Turning Into A Bear

I don't know if I can actually constitute myself and King Ralph as being held hostage, since we signed up and attended on our own free will...well it was kind of required: SOAR, aka MSU Orientation.  However folks, when you are told to attend informational meetings from 10am-8pm... let's just call it what it it felt like--hostage! 

Hostage in an ice box. Seriously I think tuition could be reduced by 15% if they cranked the A/C up in the theater alone.  I had arms and legs that looked like a chicken just plucked, and my feet were a couple of blocks of ice.  Hey while we are talking feet... once you have spent 4 hours listening to topic talks about homesickness, student alcohol consumption and smoking pot in your dorm room by filtering it through a toilet paper tube stuffed with dryer sheets... well friends you start staring at the floor. Then you notice people's feet, like the gal next to me who had two full toes and three half toes. And, the two full toes where exactly the ones she needed to wear flip flops successfully.  Then you find yourself, at least King Ralph and I did, wanting to stand up and scream when the fifth person asked the same dumb question about how the Health Center functioned.  Listening ears people, turn them on.  King Ralph was losing it by 6pm, when he started showing me all the tools that make up his Swiss Army knife. (For the record the tooth pick scares me.)  Unlike the mother who sat next to me, and had an hour nap with her bobble head...I stayed awake for every minute of every topic--boring and informational.  

By 830pm we finally made it to the Holiday Inn, where I promptly redeemed by free drink coupon for a glass of white wine, paired with a basket of complimentary popcorn and my bag of trail mix.  Aaaaaahhhh!  Freedom.  The joy of not listening to yet another college topic talk. Then we caught a few z's and did it all again the next day. Donated a few green backs to the bookstore for some Bear wear and hit the road home.

You know what? It was so worth every minute of information overload to see M excited about the choice she made to grow and develope!

To that we all say: Go Bears!

Or.

Maybe we say: Missouri State University here's my wallet, take it all.